Thursday, October 15, 2009

Life is friggin' hard.

People get sick, people die, they disappoint us in many ways.
that stinks.

I remember when I was trying to stop those days...most all of my problems revolved around gambling (or...those were the only problems that I was keenly aware of).

It seemed like...if I could just STOP...
things would be would be easy.

Well....I DID stop...and things ARE better....but life is STILL not easy.

is it supposed to be? lol

when I first arrived at safe harbor I had no belief in God...and I wavered between being envious of those of you who did....or being irritated with you.....and feeling sorry for you.

I have learned that there is a difference between religion and spirituality....and in learning that...found the freedom to believe MY way.

we often refer to 'recovery' as a journey.....and it is....but it's a small portion of the BIGGER journey I am on....this life.

I believe I am (we are all) here for a purpose.....and the purpose is to take the journey

So even when it's hard...even when I think I just can't take any more....I just keep putting one foot in front of the other...and try to do the next right thing.....

It isn't always easy (like lately)....but I'm grateful that I'm HERE (ie not gambling) I'm physically and emotionally able to do what needs to be done....and to be here with/for other family members who are struggling (with life being hard). is hard.....but the one thing I know for sure is....gambling would not...could not POSSIBLY make it better.

No comments: