Reaching out

So it was Mardi Gras.
We had guests in from several states and from Canada.

A few weeks ago I ran into a guy that works with my husband and we are talking and he says to me “I’ll bet this will work…OH…I forgot…you can’t bet”.
It sort of surprised me that he knew…and…maybe irritated me a little? That I didn’t KNOW he knew?...or maybe…irritated at the way he said that?
I mentioned it to my husband who said that he didn’t recall telling the guy…but then…”maybe I did…I’m not sure…I am not embarrassed by it…I may have told him.”

Wow.

He is not embarrassed. After all I’ve done.

That was so freeing…and quite timely, I might add.

We were at a Mardi Gras party when I was talking to the wife of ANOTHER of his co-workers.

She loves to gamble.

We were at a party the night before..she and her husband left early…and gambled until 6:30 the next morning.

I remember those days.

I’m not even sure how we began talking about it..but I shared that I no longer gamble….that I have a problem.

She was very surprised. Most people are. I have even been told by a g.a. member of many years “You don’t look like a gambler.”

I think that’s so funny.

We have a look?

Anyway….I didn’t say too much to her…I didn’t mention g.a. or any online resources…..she was sure that she’s ok….’it is under control’ but she talked about it quite a bit…and it is, most certainly, no longer under control.

I had no agenda at all….it’s ok with ME if she gambles…it doesn’t affect my life….Plenty of people gamble…it’s ok by me…*I* don’t care if she seeks help or not…or acknowledges that there is a problem…*I* don’t feel the need to convince her that she needs help.

The thing is….it’s hard enough to do this…to get better…when we are hurting…..and we KNOW that we need to stop and we REALLY REALLY WANT to!!!...so….if someone still thinks that they’ve got it ‘under control’…well…you get my drift.

I answered her questions…while I didn’t mention any particular organization or literature….I am sure that I made it clear that there is help available, if she wants it…..that….we are not alone…..and….the biggest thing…..the most important thing….there is life after gambling….there is peace….and joy.

I didn’t SAY all of those things.

But, then, I didn’t need to SAY it…… these days….it just shows.