Friday, January 4, 2008

Being in the Moment

I am just learning how to LIVE (like 'normal' people)... how to just BE

that's it

just BE

that was hard for me

even before I gambled, it was so hard for me to relax...I always felt like I should be DOING something or GOING somewhere..or


to just...


to just relax?

Be comfortable wherever I am?

Doing whatever it is I am doing?

With whomever I am with?

to just BEEEE


when I started hanging around people in 'recovery'...

hearing some of the recovery-speak...specifically, 'one day at a time'


that means just don't gamble today, right?


i mean...

MAYBE that's what it means (to you)...

that's what it meant to me (at first)..


I was at an online meeting...a few weeks after I stopped gambling..and the topic was 'what one day at a time means to you'

so different people in the meeting shared on that...and I was amazed at some of the different perspectives....and.....suddenly, 'one day at a time' took on new meaning for me.

two things - GRATITUDE...and BEING in the moment.

right now...

this moment...

not to worry about what's for dinner or errands that I have to run this evening...or my kids' homework blah blah...

those are things that i'll concern myself with that LATER..

when Later gets here :)

so...for now...

I'll be in this moment...sitting at my office (grateful to have a job)...

my back is hurting...has been hurting for a while now...but...I have the ability to feel :)

back ache...sign of getting old...yes, least I am still here...getting older....

Being in the moment…sort of FORCES us to be grateful….

to be aware of the abundance all around us....even whe we feel that we have little.

I remember...last year...when I 'got' this.....this BEING in the moment...

I was in the shower...the water was hot....I could FEEL...I had warm water..CLEAN warm water..and soap..and a home to bathe in....

A while later, I went downstairs to start cooking...I was completely aware of everything that I did..and all that I with which to nurture my children..again, clean water...a stove, dishes...CHILDREN!!

the ability to stand and cook..and to be grateful.

It occurs to me that when I worry….it is because I am thinking about what MAY happen…or what WILL happen…not what *IS* happening NOW.

One day at a moment at a time....after all...this moment is all that we have.

I suppose I HAVE lived one day (or one moment) at a time in the past in UNHEALTHY that....I lived in that moment AS IF IT WERE NOT CONNECTED TO EVERY OTHER MOMENT THAT I HAVE (AND WILL) LIVE.....

each moment that we our life.

Live One Day at a Time - What does it mean to live one day at a time? 'One day at a time' does not mean doing today only that which is useful today. If we spend time in training to enable us to eventually earn a living, or if we put away money in a pension fund for our retirement, that is not a violation of one day at a time. If we try to correct a mistake of the past by making amends, that is not a violation of one day at a time. Doing something today to prepare for the future or to compensate for the past is perfectly okay. However, if we worry about either a past or future event that we can do nothing about, that is a violation of one day at a time-for example, after taking a final exam, if we worry about what the grade might be. All the worry in the world will not change that grade. Or if we worry about another person's behavior over which we have no control. Or if we think today about how we are going to deal with the urge to drink next holiday season. 'One day at a time' simply means dealing today with something we can do something about, and leaving alone those things we can do nothing about. Perhaps people who do not ascribe to 'one day at a time' have a secret method for doing something about things they can do nothing about. Could they please come forward and share this with the rest of us? --- Dr. Abraham J. Twerski

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