Suffering

Life is hard.
Life is not fair.

Why is it that I believe I should not suffer?
Or
That people that I am close to…that I love, should not suffer?

We will all die.
We will all lose people that we love…and we will grieve.
We will likely experience much suffering aside from that.

I there anyone who does not suffer?

Can you imagine…what that person might be like? The person who lived a life without suffering?

Paris Hilton comes to mind…but then..she recently went to jail, didn’t she? I recall tears.

Surely, that does not compare to the suffering that some other humans have endured…but can we really compare our suffering? And…even if we can…what’s the point?

Whether someone else suffers more or less than I do…what does it mean?

It means…their life is different than mine…their journey is different from mine.

Everyone’s is.

Suffering.

I have done my share.

When I am in the midst of my pain, I really do not want to hear things like ‘he/she is in a better place’ or ‘he/she is not suffering any more’ or ‘it was for the best’ or ‘everything happens for a reason’.

When I am suffering, those one-liners piss me off. I don’t CARE if it’s for the best or if there is a reason or if ANYTHING….things are NOT the way I WANT them to BE.

So there it is.

The source of my suffering.

Things are not the way I want them to be.

Only when I am not in the midst of my pain am I able to see that....do I dare say it?.....that....suffering offers the gift of growth.

So….the end to suffering is…letting go??? Letting go of control…or of TRYING to control things that are beyond my control??? Acceptance??

I think so.
At least, that is what I think today.

I am doing this successfully…or at least PRETTY successfully in my life lately…but I have only had to ‘let go’ of small, day to day issues….

When that other shoe DOES drop….we will see…. To what degree I will be able to LIVE what I am learning.

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As I started to picture the trees in the storm, the answer began to dawn on me. The trees in the storm don't try to stand up straight and tall and erect. They allow themselves to bend and be blown with the wind. They understand the power of letting go. Those trees and those branches that try too hard to stand up strong and straight are the ones that break. Now is not the time for you to be strong, Julia, or you, too, will break.-- Julia Butterfly Hill