Letter to a Friend, March 2008

*posted with permission from my friend


i seeeeeee --- you're still gambling....and you thought that I would judge you.

well.....here's my thoughts on the fact that you still gamble.

I know lots of people who gamble.
Some gamble compulsively...some not.
I don't have a problem with any of them gambling.
why on earth should I? unless, of course, they are gambling with MY money....or are abusing me in some way by gambling.

To be honest...I don't care if you gamble...EXCEPT...that YOU do not want to gamble....
so since YOU do not want to gamble.....I feel sad for you if and when you do...because I know it hurts you.

I am never disappointed IN you....
FOR you..yes...
IN you...no.

I do not believe that this is a BEHAVIOR problem....
I do not believe that we are to be praised when we manage not to gamble...or berated when we do.
I am thrilled...or excited FOR you when you do not gamble we will CELEBRATE then...but not PROUD...
but not DISAPPOINTED when you do, either....just sad.

Each of us....are doing our own thing....I mean...in LIFE....we all have our own lives to live -- not talking about gambling here...just talking about LIFE...

I do not care about the gambling...I care about how you FEEL.

I know what gambling did to ME...the desperation..the hopelessness.....I wish you wouldn't gamble because I know how wonderful it feels when we break free...I know that when you DO break free (and you will...if you don't stop trying) you will feel WONDERFUL about it....

so...

it saddens me that you are gambling...

only because it saddens YOU that you are gambling...