Tuesday, December 11, 2007


Some people have urges throughout their lives...even after years of abstinence.

Others do not.

*I* believe that it has a lot to do with how we THINK about it..and it takes a WHILE to get here...it is a process...but..for a long time...not gambling felt like I was being DEPRIVED of something...that voice in my head would often say things like..'who could blame me?'or'i DESERVE it'

like it was some sort of reward.

I don't see it that way any more.

Gambling was my master.
I was in a prison...
I was not free to make my own choices or to
I was not free to do ANYTHING else!!!

today...i am free.

i have no desire to gamble.

if i KNEW that tomorrow I could gamble normally (which, i believe...I would never be able to do)..I would not gamble...

today...it holds nothing for me.

I want my life.

I deserve to be happy.

so do you.

*note: More on Urges HERE

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